Late night eating is something I keep very close to my heart. Not only emotionally, but also I spill things on my chest when I’m eating and it’s dark out. Recently, my good friend and I had quite a night. It started with El Nuevo Mexicano,continued on to beach drinking, then to a bar, then to a late comedy show, and then finally ended at a pizzeria on Clark St. at 2am-ish.
Dimo’s Pizza
I’m sure your first question might be, “Chloe, what the hell were you doing in Wrigleyville at 2 am?!” I don’t know, Mom! Your second question might then be, “What did you have?” Well, I had two (TWO!) slices of some good ‘za from Dimo’s: one mac & cheese and one mystery veggie. We ate on the curb, cause when in Rome, right? And then I woke up with hot sauce on my heels. It was a glorious night, and it got me thinking about the subject of after hours meals.
Often times, I feel there is more pressure involved with this meal, especially in comparison to others. I think it has something to do with how late night meals are typically discussed way before the meal itself. Here’s a sample conversation had before a standard dinner in America:
“Jim, where you wanna go to eat?”
“Chili’s?”
“Sure. I’ll get my pocketbook.”
Now here’s an example of a conversation had before any late night meal situation:
“Bad beef bel yack yack TAMALES, Jenny!”
“No, Jessica! Me want half worms dnaswi BURGER!”
This gibberish continues on the dance floor, then into a cab/train/train platform/street corner where a decision is met approximately 112 minutes from the idea’s conception.
While I’m sure my mother would prefer me stay mum about my abysmal late night eating habits (and my lack of shaving regularly – another story, yes), I prefer to dive in to the subject and drive-in to the dishes. I am terrible at food-related segues, but I think that was a commendable attempt. Regardless, there are so many ways to ruin your evening by going amateur on a late night eating bender. Here’s how to stay classy and sassy with your late night eats.
First of all, don’t go for the standard fast food fix. While yes, this is cheap and convenient, think about how much better your life will be with a grilled portabello tartine, homemade chips and (9th) glass of wine from Bijan’s Bistro! It has ‘bistro’ in its name! It has to be good! Also, I once saw Rachel McAdams there after a night at the theatre. She eats late night, too! She’s just like us! And let’s put it this way, if you skip McDonald’s or Taco Bell, you may come close to kissing Ryan Gosling. 
(yes, I just emoticon’d)
Next, similar to pool, always think several steps ahead. While I would love to go to Simone’s for some delicious pub grub, I live on the north side, and if I’m already out west, we’re talking quite the commute to get a burger in Pilsen. One of the best things of late night eats is going home immediately to dream sweetly. Unless I’m willing to shell out an additional 20 bucks on cab fare (cause that’s the safest), I’ll be S.O.L. ‘S.O.L.’ means Shelling Out Lottery Funds, btw. (can’t stop emoticonin’!)
Another thing to keep in mind when eating towards the end of your eve is: who is your company? Do they have food allergies? Do they have Celiac disease? Are they whiny? Sometimes a good meal is all about the company you keep, and if someone in your group has IBS, chances are the worst thing you could do to your night is go to La Pasadita, get ultimate burritos and then pour on the hot sauce. Night ruined for all, trust that. Maybe the better option is to head on over to Pick Me Up for some pancakes or vegan fare. Skip the hot sauce. Duh.
Finally, something I find to be underrated and totally awesome is cooking at home. Not only is this when I’m the most confident and creative, it’s also great training for being a mother, which is why you’re reading this blog, I assume. I have made some delicious 3am buffets out of frozen french fries, hummus, random sauces, a box of pasta, and bits of veggies and fruits. This is just the tip of the iceberg of classic Chloe late night treats, my friends. Most of them are usually weird and disgusting to any normal, well-adjusted human, but I do find its a great way to use up old stuff, get creative, get confident and get fed!
There are plenty of options in the city for tastiness in the wee hours! Post-midnight food doesn’t always have to be fried, over-salted and doused in ketchup. And of all the things to bring home after a late night, I’d rather it be a doggie bag. (really can’t stop)